When someone asks me if I believe God will answer their prayers, I don’t say, “Just be a good person and he will.”
We all know what it's like to pray an urgent prayer that God seems not to answer. But as a psychologist who has walked with Christ for many years, I've learned that God gives one of three answers to our prayers: Yes, No, or Wait!
A child can ask a parent for candy, and lots of it. The parent can say, "Yes, just one piece." Or, "No, it's bad for your teeth." Or, "Wait until Halloween, and then you can have your fill."
We are God's children. We do well to learn trust and patience in praying to God. Too much of a demand quality to our prayer means we treat God like our personal slave: "If you don't keep my grandmother from dying I'll hate your forever!" But too little expectation means we don't trust God at all: "God, I know you've got more important things to do than pay attention to me." Scripture counsels a midpoint between these extremes:
"This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him" (1 John 5:14-15).
If you want to develop more awareness about how God answers your prayers, I suggest you begin taking risks by initiating genuine
conversations with God. And watching how the Lord responds.
What happens when you risk a spontaneous little prayer? When you include the Lord in your inner life? Over the years you learn to invite him into every imaginable situation. But there’s something else. Little
heartfelt prayers fulfill the Lord’s desire for companionship with you!
Answers to prayer vary as much as blooming flowers.
Some are
like pansies that blossom overnight. Others are like bulbs planted in
winter
soil, which seem not to grow at all; then springtime comes and they
erupt with
life. Still others are like roses that require care over many years, but
their
delicate petals and distinctive fragrance make them well worth the
effort. Whether God’s reply is quick or seemingly takes forever, you can count on a response.
A Little Prayer of Longing
Gwen made an appointment to see me at a college where I was
teaching. A student in my Psychology of Religion course, she had met the
assignments, but stayed silent in class.
When she arrived for the appointment, I invited her in and offered her a seat. My desk lamp cast soft light on her frowning face.
“I want to talk about something you said in class the other
day,” she said.
I nodded my encouragement.
"You said that God wants a real relationship with each of
us. That he knows us by name. That he wants to walk and talk with us.”
“Yes, I believe that’s true,” I said.
“Well, I have a problem. I was raised in a Christian home
and went to church all my life. But I don’t feel close to God. It seems like
the Lord is way too big to really know about me. I feel like I’m this little
grain of sand who shouldn’t bother him.”
“Is it like you know God loves humanity, but why would he
want Gwen as his personal friend?”
“Exactly. I’m so ordinary. I’m not that good in school and
half the time I feel bored in church. I’m not anything special.”
“Yet you care enough about your relationship with the Lord
to come here and talk about it.”
“I guess so. I don’t know what else to do.”
Gwen,” I said, “I
wonder if you would dare to ask the Lord to come to you in a private way that
you can really recognize. Something that would show that he knows you.”
“You mean just talk to him?” she asked, eyebrows arching.
I nodded. “Maybe you could say a little prayer right now,
just the way you are talking to me.”
“Well, this feels kind of awkward, but I’ll try,” she said.
We bowed our heads.
After a moment of silence, she said, “God, I have felt
lonely for so long. I go through all the motions of being religious, but I
don’t feel you in my life. Please show me that you love me. Help me know you’re
really there. Amen.”
When I looked up, Gwen was dabbing her eyes with a Kleenex. I sensed that she was opening her heart to God in this little prayer. I wondered how Christ would answer her.
When I looked up, Gwen was dabbing her eyes with a Kleenex. I sensed that she was opening her heart to God in this little prayer. I wondered how Christ would answer her.
A week later there was a knock on my office door. When I
opened it, there stood Gwen with a grin on her face.
She handed me a bright red
greeting card and said, “Go ahead and open it.”
Puzzled, I flipped open the card. The printed message read, “Our friendship will last forever.” Underneath, written in beautiful handwriting, were the words, “Dear Gwen, you don’t know me, but the Lord told me to buy this card and send it to you. He said for you to read Isaiah 43:1. Best wishes.” It was unsigned.
“This card was in my campus mailbox yesterday,” Gwen
explained. “I looked up the verse in Isaiah and it says, ‘I have called you by
name, you are mine.’”
My heart caught. “And you still don’t know who sent it?”
“No. But I do know that God loves me!”
What
worked for Gwen will work for you: going straight to the Lord when you
face a lonely disconnect from God. Like Gwen, you can risk praying to
the Lord by "casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you" (1 Pet 5:7 NKJV).